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zombietampons

6.3k points

2 months ago*

jabberwock91

2.7k points

2 months ago

Naked Gun 1.

Naked Gun 2 1/2.

Naked Gun 33 1/3.

All fucking brilliant. 33 1/3 is actually my favorite.

WillemDafoesHugeCock

813 points

2 months ago

The first movie is my favorite but the third has some of my favorite gags in the entire series. The sperm center scene is one of the best in the trilogy. The prison riot scene is solid gold. The scene where Jane is breaking up with Frank and everything moves impossibly quickly kills me every time, the way the cab driver checks his watch impatiently is perfect. And that's not even mentioning the one liners.

"Like a midget at a urinal, I was going to have to stay on my toes."

"Kinky. But I like my sex the way I play basketball, one on one with as little dribbling as possible."

"Rocco could tell from my little escapade in the shower that I was well endowed... with courage."

TotemTabuBand

133 points

2 months ago

Cheer up, Ed. This is not goodbye. It’s just, I won’t ever see you again.

DevilRenegade

51 points

2 months ago

"The red light district.. What was he doing hanging around there?"

"Sex, Frank?"

"Uhh, not right now Ed, we've got work to do."

understater

524 points

2 months ago

“Like a blind man in an orgy, I was going to have to feel my way around.”

zebba_oz

159 points

2 months ago

zebba_oz

159 points

2 months ago

She ruled the city the same way she made love - with an iron fist

umthondoomkhlulu

6 points

2 months ago

Mr poopy pants

yankdotcom1985

12 points

2 months ago

"Doctors say that Nordberg has a 50 50 chance of living, though there’s only a 10 percent chance of that"

those 3 films had some of the best one liners ever

madcaesar

5 points

2 months ago

Hahaha 😂 this one is fantastic, I'll have to find a situation to use this!

seanmonaghan1968

78 points

2 months ago

Nice beaver

dexter311

60 points

2 months ago

Thanks, I just had it stuffed

Dumptruck_Johnson

2 points

2 months ago

Let me help you with that

lemon_tea

20 points

2 months ago

You call this stuff slop? Real slop has chunks of stuff in it. This is more like gruel.

nightshift89

34 points

2 months ago

I've come across you before, willemdafoeshugecock, but I don't recall the subreddit now. Nice to see you in the wild

Gqsmooth1969

20 points

2 months ago

How often do you cum across williamdefoeshugecock?

GodwynDi

7 points

2 months ago

Probably less than it cums across him

thehoneybadger-x

7 points

2 months ago

I was surrounded by pimps, murderers and rapists. It felt like I was in the stands at a Raiders game.

StevieKix_

23 points

2 months ago

Your username is amazing

UnclePjupp

4 points

2 months ago

For me it's the train chase scene from the 2nd movie.. absolutely hilarious

Exact-Repair-2730

3 points

2 months ago

Username..

Strong-Formal-7739

3 points

2 months ago

My favorite because I love good fart and piss jokes is in part one when Frank's still micked and takes a piss.

JonesyMcG

3 points

2 months ago

That shot of Anna Nicole Smith going up her legs and she has 10 kneecaps.

Cyber-Knight47

2 points

2 months ago

I’m in full agreement u/WillemDafoesHugeCock

MrMonstrosoone

1 points

2 months ago

the sound effects of him in the room is classic

Atari18

1 points

2 months ago

Oh is the sperm bank scene where he's writing with lipstick but puts it on when he gets caught? "Always important to look your best, even when you're alone"

WillemDafoesHugeCock

2 points

2 months ago

Yes, but my favorite line is "it's kind of NUMB"

pumped-up-tits

52 points

2 months ago

Bingo!

knightopusdei

13 points

2 months ago

Nice Beaver!

MarriedForLife

11 points

2 months ago

Thank you. I just had it stuffed.

holzODB

115 points

2 months ago

holzODB

115 points

2 months ago

SAME! I love them all but grew up watching 33 1/3 the most. Can still quite the whole thing and I haven’t seen it in maybe 10 years now.

bill10351

185 points

2 months ago

bill10351

185 points

2 months ago

Take it from me, McGerk, this place changes a man.

Oh yeah, in what way?

I used to be white.

United1958

40 points

2 months ago

I was a drummer for The Osmonds

bill10351

31 points

2 months ago

Screw around with me, and Tyrone here will make you feel pain that you'd never believe.

United1958

35 points

2 months ago

I know I remember The Osmonds

TimmyTheChemist

176 points

2 months ago

Don't forget about Police Squad!

infinitemonkeytyping

15 points

2 months ago

"Is this a bust?"

"Yes, it's very impressive, but that's not why we're here."

and this one

"We would have been here sooner, but your husband wasn't dead yet"

and this one

"Cigarette?"

"Yes, it is."

echo-94-charlie

14 points

2 months ago

This whole conversation is gold: https://youtu.be/tpGn37Svp6I

TheOtherAvaz

4 points

2 months ago

That's some huge Who's On First energy, I love it.

Puterman

42 points

2 months ago

In Color!

NSilverguy

21 points

2 months ago

With Abraham Lincoln!

Puterman

17 points

2 months ago

And special guest, Lorne Greene.

_The_Librarian

12 points

2 months ago

dies

fistingbythepool

6 points

2 months ago

And Rex Hamilton as Abraham Lincoln

Personmanwomantv

12 points

2 months ago

These guns are identical to the one that killed Jim Johnson. Watch carefully as I test fire this gun into these video tapes of Barbara Walters interviews.

As you can see, it completely destroys the Burt Reynolds interview, and everything from Bo Derek to Paul Newman - but only up to the point where Barbara asks him "is it difficult to love?"

Heavens10000whores

10 points

2 months ago

Magnificent series

TimmyTheChemist

10 points

2 months ago

What there was of it. Alas, we hardly knew ye...

It's like distilled Naked Gun.

Heavens10000whores

6 points

2 months ago

Like The Office (uk), hit ‘em hard, hit ‘em quick and then gtfo

iamthinksnow

8 points

2 months ago*

What is it?

BiHGamer

32 points

2 months ago

Police Squad

A small squad of policemen trained to deal with a particular kind of crime, but that's not important right now.

iamthinksnow

18 points

2 months ago

Hmm, guess I picked the wrong day to stop sniffing glue.

(cue freeze frame, coffee pouring over the side of the mug, perp in the background making a break for it since all the cops are standing still)

TimmyTheChemist

21 points

2 months ago*

It was a TV series made by the same people that produced Naked Gun. It only made it about halfway through the first season, but it essentially beta tested a lot of the jokes that made it into the Naked Gun movies. It was even more dense/deadpan though - you definitely don't catch everything the first time you watch.

If you're a fan of the Naked Gun trilogy it's definitely worth looking up.

Edit: Yeah, definitely missed the setup there... r/whoosh

iamthinksnow

23 points

2 months ago

...but that's not important right now.

(That's the joke)

Personmanwomantv

32 points

2 months ago

Who are you and how did you get in here?

I'm a locksmith. And I'm a locksmith.

Dave5876

3 points

2 months ago

Cigarette?

Xen0bus

2 points

2 months ago

My favorite joke in the series

Theoretical_Action

19 points

2 months ago

I accidentally exited the thread and scrolled all the way back down here to find and up vote you. Police Squad is fucking fantastic and I can't believe how few of people have ever even heard of it before.

TimmyTheChemist

6 points

2 months ago

I had no idea about it until an enthusiastic friend showed it to me years ago. Got to spread the news.

wottsinaname

3 points

2 months ago

Im so glad people are picking this up now. I think its the funniest thing the Zucker bros ever wrote.

But because it was literally too witty with too many gags for the local audience it flopped within a few eps.

Noeli0

2 points

2 months ago

Noeli0

2 points

2 months ago

In my top 5 TV shows of all time, easily and without hesitation

jmhimara

4 points

2 months ago

I thought the TV show was better than all three movies combined. Honestly, I found the movies kinda average.

echo-94-charlie

7 points

2 months ago

There is a character difference. In the series, everyone plays the deadpan completely straight. When Nielsen says something stupid he might be corrected but it is not treated like it is stupid. Just like if you corrected the misspelling of a name.

In the movies, Nielsen is a buffoon and the world knows it. The movies are making fun of him.

pobody

23 points

2 months ago

pobody

23 points

2 months ago

I wish there had been an Airplane! 3.

okami_shinobi003

8 points

2 months ago

No…. That’s just what they’d expect us to do…

Wrathwilde

3 points

2 months ago

Do you like movies about Gladiators?

pobody

6 points

2 months ago

pobody

6 points

2 months ago

Have you ever been to a Turkish prison?

Smokadocious

1 points

2 months ago

Shirley you must be joking...

kaihatsusha

9 points

2 months ago

When my coworkers and I were watching the infamous White Bronco Chase Scene with a suicidal O.J., we proposed that depending on whether he got out of it or not, the next titles would be Naked Gun .44 To The Head, or conversely, Naked Gun 55 To Life.

albino_red_head

5 points

2 months ago

Leslie Nielsen. What a freaking legend.

OpeScuseMe74

7 points

2 months ago

I was very disappointed when they didn't subtitle 33 1/3 as "For the Record".

BrusilovsThundergun

5 points

2 months ago

Rocco?

Papsmear!?

OtherKrab

4 points

2 months ago

I love 33 1/3 I was old enough to remember it coming out in the cinema but I was too young to see it - bless my Dad for renting it.

roger_the_virus

3 points

2 months ago

Same! I did get to go see NG 33 1/3 as well as Loaded Weapon 1. The Hot Shots movies were on regular rotation for me too… my humor level never changed lol.

OtherKrab

2 points

2 months ago

Oh man my Dad tried to get me and my lil bro into hotshots part deux (it was one of the first "12a" rated movies) but they wouldn't let my brother in (I think he was 10). Whatever film we went to see instead has not stayed in my memory.

yuribotcake

5 points

2 months ago

The amount of detail in every shot is astounding. This was way before cg too.

-KevinAndEarth-

4 points

2 months ago

Nobody could replace Leslie Nielson, but if they came out with a Naked Gun today, who would play him?

bomber991

6 points

2 months ago

I hear Liam Neeson has a very specific set of skills, maybe he could do it?

-KevinAndEarth-

2 points

2 months ago

I would watch the shit out of a Liam Naked Gun. This needs to happen and I'll take royalties.

Rocco0427

5 points

2 months ago

Steve Martin

-KevinAndEarth-

1 points

2 months ago

Omg yes.

Mansionjoe

4 points

2 months ago

But Enrico Pallazzo is only in the 1st one

MacinTez

4 points

2 months ago

“And in his tale of genetics gone hay wire in a retirement community, Steven Spielberg’s Geriatric Park…”

neon_overload

5 points

2 months ago

Kids these days probably don't know that 33 1/3 is the speed you play an LP

taco_flavored_kesses

3 points

2 months ago

"Like a blind man at an orgy, I was going to have to feel things out"

BronxLens

3 points

2 months ago

And 33 1/3 is the one available on Amazon Prime. Watching it tonight!

Plankton_Brave

3 points

2 months ago

I couldn't stop laughing.

dddmmmccc817

4 points

2 months ago

My dead beat dad who walked out of my life introduced me to naked gun 33 1/3 and it is the only positive thing he's ever done for me. You are right about them being brilliant

BenTheMotionist

2 points

2 months ago

I LOVE IT.

ogfloat3r

2 points

2 months ago

You are brilliant. this shit is epic.

big_nothing_burger

2 points

2 months ago

Kill Whitey!! Attica!!

Stonk_Cousteau

2 points

2 months ago

Hey, It’s Enrico Palazzo!

dangercat415

2 points

2 months ago

... And don't call me Shirley.

I use this joke all the time. 😎

IntentionalTexan

1 points

2 months ago

And for Snowball in Hell, Stephan Segal.

Easily the funniest movie line ever.

Brett511

1 points

2 months ago

I’ve been swimming in raw sewage. I LOVE IT!

why_am_i_here69

1 points

2 months ago

I'm not sure, I think it's the first one? When the first scene OJ raids the boat, with all the gangsters. Then proceeds to get caught up in a sequence of calamities?

Chiron17

1 points

2 months ago

I just got this joke

mrGlekkev

1 points

2 months ago

Are they available on a streaming service? I really want to watch them again, its been so long.

Atari18

1 points

2 months ago

I've been swimming in raw sewage...I love it

PoorFilmSchoolAlumn

79 points

2 months ago

The car chase in the driver’s ed car is the greatest car chase in any film ever.

DeepsCL9

42 points

2 months ago

Extend your left arm...

GeminiRebellion

49 points

2 months ago

Extend your middle finger...

kyle_sux666

15 points

2 months ago

Very good

theveryoldman0

24 points

2 months ago

GO FOR IT STEPHANIE

LeopardDue1112

3 points

2 months ago

To this day I cannot see a driver's ed car without thinking of Stephanie.

Derton10

3 points

2 months ago

How appalled the truck driver is after getting flipped off kills me every time.

Ltn_Frank_Drebin

62 points

2 months ago

RaqueI, so many go to bed hungry in this nation. Yet, cat food's full of tuna. I can't help thinking each time I go to the zoo and see those porpoises crammed into tiny tanks, what a waste that is.

Butcher half of them now. Hundreds of pounds of dolphin meat that could be fed to cats, freeing up that tuna for our nation's hungry.

Ltn_Frank_Drebin

30 points

2 months ago

So many are cold, shivering in the night. I say take those cats and skin them. Use their fur to keep hundreds warm.

United1958

11 points

2 months ago

Raquel: Jesus Phil!

02K30C1

384 points

2 months ago

02K30C1

384 points

2 months ago

Hey! It’s Enrico Palazzo!

EnricoPalazz0

225 points

2 months ago

Yes?

Abby-N0rma1

154 points

2 months ago

And the rocket's red glare, Lots of bombs in the air. Gave proof to the night that we still had our flag. Oh say does that flag banner wave Over a-a-all that's free. And the home of the land, And the land of the - FREE!

CalmBeforePsych

127 points

2 months ago

The officers/security slowly sidestepping their way toward him while paying respect to the flag still cracks me up.

soobviouslyfake

76 points

2 months ago

Everything in the movie cracks me up. I watched them with my dad when I was probably still way too young to see them - I just learned to laugh when he did. Now I'm watching it thinking how the fuck he thought it was okay.

"Nice beaver!!! Thank-you, I just had it stuffed.".

Like holy shit dad

CalmBeforePsych

11 points

2 months ago

I was too young too! Holy hell the jokes I only got when I grew older.

KawiZed

5 points

2 months ago

Can we talk about the concrete dildo? My parents were more prudish than most, yet this movie got a pass.

lehilaukli

1 points

2 months ago

This is very similar to my experience, except it was my grandpa who I watched them with. I didn't get most of the jokes but still enjoyed them.

FugaciousD

5 points

2 months ago

To this day I cannot think of that song without “that we still had our flag” line popping into my head.

iamthinksnow

2 points

2 months ago

Lots of bombs in the air, for me.

FugaciousD

2 points

2 months ago

Same—that is what kicks it off and I almost sing it.

Dusty129

3 points

2 months ago

Adlerson

2 points

2 months ago

Been waiting since 2013 for this moment? :D

AVnightmares

1 points

2 months ago

/r beetlejuicing

mikeyd69

4 points

2 months ago

ALRIGHT.....YOU'RE OUTTA HERE!!!!

gregorythegreyhound

5 points

2 months ago

Long time MLB umpire Joe West was one of the other umps that Frank tossed.

Skandranen

1 points

2 months ago

Joe West should be tossed permanently, off a bus, into moving traffic.....

MudIsland

3 points

2 months ago

Enri-Co Pala-zzo! Enri-Co Pala-zzo! Enri-Co Pala-zzo! Enri-Co Pala-zzo!

NSilverguy

4 points

2 months ago

Excuse me, can you tell me if this is a regulation bat? 💥😵‍💫💤

clebo99

1 points

2 months ago

Best single line from the 80s!!!!

ilrosewood

3 points

2 months ago

I love that the actor was credited as the “Hey - It’s Enrico Pallazzo” Guy

clebo99

2 points

2 months ago

He was in other things. I remember him from one of the Pee Wee movies I think.

Steve_at_Werk

42 points

2 months ago

Well, when I see five weirdos dressed in togas, stabbing a man in the middle of the park in front of a full view of 100 people, I shoot the bastards, that's my policy.

Opening_Success

10 points

2 months ago

Ha! My favorite scene in the movie.

You killed 5 actors! Good ones!

United1958

3 points

2 months ago

That was a Sheakespeare in the Park production of Julius Caesar you moron!

dv_

94 points

2 months ago

dv_

94 points

2 months ago

The baseball stadium scene where multiple baseballs are thrown into the air made my sides hurt from laughter.

DeepsCL9

103 points

2 months ago

DeepsCL9

103 points

2 months ago

The entire Third Acts from both Naked Gun 1 and 33 1/3 had me in tears.

For me, it was the random Chrysler hitting one of the players on the Baseball game highlights reel.

holzODB

18 points

2 months ago

holzODB

18 points

2 months ago

Oh my god! Look at Donahue!!

Somebody make a note….I don’t think we should Phil Donahue on the show next year.

DeepsCL9

17 points

2 months ago

My god, what is that?

I think it's Phil Donahue throwing up in a Tuba...

Opening_Success

3 points

2 months ago

Turn it over to Raquel.

Kingpin329

9 points

2 months ago

How about that!

Opening_Success

7 points

2 months ago

Or the guy going back to rob the home run when his head bifurcates from his body at the top of the wall. Still cracks me up.

sagitta_luminus

9 points

2 months ago

Frank accidentally pushing Nordberg down the stairs and the dummy rocketing out of the chair. I was 9 when I saw that and it was the funniest fucking thing I’d ever seen.

Opening_Success

1 points

2 months ago

I'm 38 and still crack up at that. The fact that it's OJ Simpson makes it funnier now.

kyle_sux666

6 points

2 months ago

The catcher then gathers all the balls and has the runner tagged out by a few feet and Frank gives the “safe” call kills me every time

political_og

80 points

2 months ago

Frank they’re here for Weird Al

cnprof

2 points

2 months ago

cnprof

2 points

2 months ago

Everywhere I look, something reminds me of her

thunderkhawk

40 points

2 months ago

Play our favorite song, Sam.

"Doing dong the witch is dead. Which old Which? The wicked witch."

United1958

6 points

2 months ago

Love that.. absolutely comical

globalsilver

14 points

2 months ago

This is it. Leslie Nielson is an S tier comedy icon.

RoccoTaco_Dog

10 points

2 months ago

Just looked online for this. Paramount plus has the first and 33 1/3 but not 2 1/2. I'm a little bummed

fistikcisahab

3 points

2 months ago

I think Netflix has all three.

RoccoTaco_Dog

3 points

2 months ago

I just checked. No go. They do have the Austin powers trilogy and the national lampoon's vacation trilogy though. I hate Chevy chase but do love those

fistikcisahab

1 points

2 months ago

Weird, I was sure watching all three in Netflix recently but maybe I'm wrong.

Infinite_Truth2066

1 points

2 months ago

Prime has both of those included. I just added them to my watchlist.

RoccoTaco_Dog

1 points

2 months ago

I added Paramount through prime so I never know which of the two it's on. I just use my prime app for both

ishiiman0

9 points

2 months ago

Solid answer that I did not expect. Always was a huge fan of all three movies and didn't feel like there was much of a dropoff between the movies. The history of comedy film sequels is really not great, especially for iconic films like the Naked Gun, so it really is a great accomplishment to be able to keep it going strong for three movies.

Wilma_Tonguefit

11 points

2 months ago

Frank driving in the first movie makes me laugh to tears every time. Crashing into random shit. The airbag starts driving the car and Frank immediately starts shooting at it. Then the car takes a right turn on its own while using the blinker.

simplepleashures

2 points

2 months ago

Anybody get a look at the driver?

gregorythegreyhound

9 points

2 months ago

Nice beaver!

OpeningEconomist8

8 points

2 months ago

“Don’t call me Shirley…”

Old_Punk_Dad

8 points

2 months ago

I wonder if OJ Simpson gets residuals from those.

RoccoTaco_Dog

2 points

2 months ago

Probably goes to the Goldman's

GeminiRebellion

8 points

2 months ago

"It's The Bomb!"

Opening_Success

3 points

2 months ago

Yay for Sawdust and Mildew!

jamesja12

7 points

2 months ago

Police squad is also fantastic.

poulet_bleu

2 points

2 months ago

Yay ! Someone else mentions it. I think since it doesnt have "Naked Gun" in its name, people forget its all in the same universe.

nipplechopz

18 points

2 months ago

Painkiller3666

11 points

2 months ago

This one always makes me chuckle.

https://youtu.be/nTh9qpzhunE

nipplechopz

5 points

2 months ago

Hahaha yes! So many great scenes it's hard to choose

funktion

3 points

2 months ago

So good it could be an Abbott & Costello bit

[deleted]

1 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

1 points

2 months ago

[removed]

[deleted]

6 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

6 points

2 months ago

This needs to be much higher up the rankings. Leslie Nielsen had ONE JOB, and he screwed it up hilariously each time.

Apotropaic_Sphinx

20 points

2 months ago*

This is probably the only right answer. Everything else is either not a trilogy, or they're looking at "that one movie" in the series with rose-colored glasses.

Police Squad/Naked Gun was brilliant start to finish.

TheCrazyPriest

20 points

2 months ago

C'mon they said trilogy. There are 33 1/3 movies in that franchise!

[deleted]

6 points

2 months ago

[deleted]

6 points

2 months ago

Best answer

HoraceGrantGlasses

4 points

2 months ago

This deserves to be higher up.

Ohnf_DIG

4 points

2 months ago

This may be an unpopular opinion, but I thought the 3rd movie was the funniest!

Arcady89

4 points

2 months ago

Little-known fact (that maybe someone in comments already mentioned but I didn't see) is that Naked Gun was indeed based off of a TV show - Police Squad. That's why at the beginning of the movie it states 'From the files of Police Squad'. There were only 6 episodes made but they're all pretty great.

Police Squad! (In Colour) - Name Confusion

Scarletmittens

5 points

2 months ago

Yuussss

TweepriseOpener

4 points

2 months ago

Beat me to it

UhOhImFucked

4 points

2 months ago

Came here to say this.

Stargazer5781

3 points

2 months ago

If you haven't watched the Police Squad tv show it's quite good too.

musicmastermike

3 points

2 months ago

Nothing can beat this

remonnoki

3 points

2 months ago

The show that those films originate from, Police Squad!, was cancelled by ABC after 7 episodes for basically being too funny.

Abject_Wait_2273

3 points

2 months ago

"You'd better tell the Captain we've got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital." "A hospital? What is it?" "It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now."

Cuchullion

3 points

2 months ago

"It's the same old story. Boy finds girl, boy loses girl, girl finds boy, boy forgets girl, boy remembers girl, girls dies in a tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Year's Day."

"Goodyear?"

"No, the worst."

annies_boobs_feet

6 points

2 months ago

As a non sports fan it introduced me to the great man that is OJ Simpson!

ilrosewood

8 points

2 months ago

Shame he never got much work after that. It just goes to show you how racist Hollywood really is.

Tammy_Craps

2 points

2 months ago

I enjoyed his slapstick. I wonder what ever happened to that guy.

epgenius

16 points

2 months ago

Really the only correct answer

sushithighs

2 points

2 months ago

Surely you can’t be serious

sermocinatrix

2 points

2 months ago

My favorite Easter egg about these movies are the end credits. There are so many hilarious gags written within the credits

OGdrummerjed

2 points

2 months ago

If doing that. I raise the question of the Police Academy movies.

Waafflespoo

1 points

2 months ago

I would marry Leslie Nielsen if he was still alive

Jlx_27

1 points

2 months ago

Jlx_27

1 points

2 months ago

There it is.

WWEzus

1 points

2 months ago

WWEzus

1 points

2 months ago

The first one is significantly better than the second and third though

FHIR_HL7_Integrator

1 points

2 months ago

Zucker Bros. In their prime are almost the GOAT for slapstick comedy, if Mel Brooks didn't exist.

tarentale

1 points

2 months ago

“Alright. That’s it. He’s had enough”